我，你，她

3 long days of wrking @ F1 is finally over.
im part of tt famous history for nw.
was really really very exhausted.
wasnt eating properly,wasnt having enough slp.
i lost almost 3kg.=(

it has been a great event.
nt sure whether i be part of it agn nx yr.
but it has been quite a experience.
managing a group of ppl wasnt easy.
thou i had done it b4,but for a group of ppl who
does nt hav e skills,it was a uphill task.

anw,watching F1 on live in action was really great.
it was a pulsating race,lots of drama n unexpected turn of events.
farrari had e best position on day 2 yet in e end they lost e final
on e 3rd day when both their drivers crashed out.
n alonso who had a 15th position emerged champion on e final.
he too became part of history to be e 1st night race champion.
it was really exciting.
for nw..i nd plenty of rest to recuperate my muscles..
they r aching like hell.

random:

i have learn alot this few days.
been concentrating fully on wrk.
thanks for showing me so much concern in e past few days.
worried abt my health n everything.
but im really alrite.
im glad i hav a friend like you.thks for being there all this while.
but now,really.i dont wish to complicate my life.
lets juz let nature take itz course.

F1

24-sep 08

1st day of set up for Spore 1st ever F1 nite race.

it was plenty of moving things ard n setting up of e rooms.

we will be catered 8rms in total.

n e rms we r in get a pretty good view of e starting n finishing lines.

so we will be actually seeing e action live n watz more,

itz free n we r paid.lol =D

met my click after wrk for dinner.they held a post birthday

celebration for me thou it had alr passed.

n im sorry i was late for almost an hr.

really felt bad abt it.

no party,no cake,no presents.

but juz dinner n catch up session.

juz e way i like it.simple meal with sm gd friends.

thou they paid for my share.

free agn..haha.

anw thks agn,

tom,alex,yizhong,ray,jess,lizhen n

claire for organising this dinner for me.

cant believe u managed to get yizhong out

been ages i hav seen him.tot he rot away frm this world alr.=P

25 sep 08

2nd day of pre-setup.

final touches to e rms we setted ytd n e 2 rms

tt we left untouched.

everything is in place for e opening day tml.

getting real excited for it as we saw e real F1 cars tdy.

plus e racers.lewis hamilton,massa etc in person.

itz like another few hrs n we will make history.

e 1st ever night race n i be there wrking n watching at e same time.

now,preparing to pack my bags n camp for e nx 3 days

at wrk.

F1 team workshop

F1 race track,starting point

Mclaren ctrl booth n of coz e real thing..F1 cars.

simlators at rm BMW.

快乐

22 SEP 2008- i've turn 26.

Quote:

简单就是美.

真心诚意的祝福,
才是最温馨的

i definitely enjoy my birthday tdy.it was a pleasant surprise.

ony tot tt i will be juz enjoying a simple dinner with my

dearest sister n good buddy.

coz i tol them juz hav a simple meal it was enough alr.

in e end i didnt knew so many of them turn up as well.=)

theres enci,juli,xiaoshi even mr henry lim!haha.

so theres ony 1 suggestion by e bunch.

e usual click n e usual stuff..sing k with buffet.lol

n i was suprised by their birthday cake attack..

wasnt expecting it.

almost cried..nah..juz kidding.

but i do definitely felt touched.

1st ever celebration i had in 26yrs,i do will remb

tdy in yrs to come n

these bunch of lovely ppl in my life.

they say real friends r hard to find,

but i had found a few true friends,a wonderful sister,good buddy

n a great manager in my short stay in mandarin.

i m contented alr.

these ppl make a difference in my life n i wld cherish

them close to my heart.

they have made this birthday special.

i really enjoyed myself,

once agn,

THANK YOU MY DEAR ONES.I LOVE U ALL!=)

i love these bunch of ppl

时间,我对你还..

listening to: 祝我生日快乐 - 温岚

我知道伤心不能改变什么

那么 让我诚实一点

诚实 难免有不能控制的宣泄

只有关上了门 不必理谁

一个人坐在空荡包厢里面

手机 让它休息一夜

难 想切歌 切掉回忆的画面

眼泪不能流过十二点

生日快乐 我对自己说

蜡烛点了 寂寞亮了

生日快乐 泪也溶了

我要谢谢 你给的你拿走的一切

还爱你 带一点恨

还要时间 才能平衡

热恋伤痕 画面重生

祝我生日快乐

Quote:

IF you really love something set it free
If it comes back it's yours .
If it doesn’t , it was never meant to be .

放。

既然已经决定要松手，

就不要再握的那么紧。

放手,也是一种爱。

累，真的累了。

Feeling: down,damn down..

its a hard to breathe morning as i sat alongside my mum n bro
at e lawyers office.listening to every word e consultant had to say.
well.final verdict is.we r ggin to court.as my parents r offically
filing for divorce.
and it meant e split of property.
e legal advice was we have to sell e house.
so it might be v soon,im gonna be homeless..
well..not exactly.
juz my mum n me have to move into my bro's place for
e time being.itz nt gonna be a long term solution.
he has 3 kids n itz gonna be squeezy,ony 3 rooms..headache.

i hate my dad.hate him to e core.after so many yrs,
he still has to come back n haunt us.
all he ever wan was money.hes totally rubbish,a fucker.
juz like my grandfather said,good for nothing.
i had wrk so hard to provide my mum a roof of our own.
yet he juz came in juz like tt n try to take everything frm us.
thou e lawyer say he wont win completely,he would at least
get 30% of e amount.darn..
but it seems tts e ony way to get him out of our lifes.
im gonna be on e move agn.=(

well,tot tt i cld put all these aside for e time being as
ppl frm mandarin wanted a gathering to celebrate my birthday.
tot at least i cld bask myself in sm fun..
it wasnt so in e end as most of e ppl cldnt make it.
it was quite last min as they really didnt plan it well enough.
i wasnt too bother thou as my mind wasnt at it anw.
n i nv celebrate my birthday,so it was ok.
i appreciate her effort.she wanted to plan smthing 4 me.
but i knew her too well.her heart wasnt at it.if i was really
tt significant,she wld hav gone to great lengths to plan it.
but i wasnt e 1.she says shes over it,but itz hard isnt it?
wld it b so easy to get over it if she didnt love him?
so it doesnt matter.n of course most importantly,
she has to go for training.its her love.
but i understand,i dont blame her.
i promised i wont flare up at her anymore or lose my temper.
im getting juz too tired for all these.
this is a small matter.so im nt making a fuss.
at least she did make an effort to came down
n accompany me for a few hrs
contented n enough.
im thkful she has e thoughts.
n e ppl ard me aso thou i really admit..this plan was a failure.

Relationship:

i once heard a friend said this:
a bird n tortoise r 2 diff animals,hw do u get them to fall in luv?
itz his logic coz of e different characters of him n his gf of 10yrs,
which nw they r happily married.
it applied to me.
im juz like a tortoise,walking at a slow n steady pace.an introvert
she is juz like a bird,flying high with freedom,an astrovert
2 different personalities.hw do u make them fall in luv?
u cant.unless sacrifices r made.
at point of danger,e tortoise wld use his shell n shield e bird.
prevent her frm getting harm.
e bird wld in turn sacrifice flyin n walk alongside e tortoise.
losing her carefreeless.
tts wat my friends did for each other.n tts y they r spending e rest
of their lifes tgt as 1.makin sacrifices for each other.

as for myself.i have alr sacrificed alot for this relationship.
time n time agn i shield her,shower her with all
e care n concern i cld give.
to other ppl i might be a perfect guy,a perfect bf.
but watz e use??
it juz seems like no matter wat i do,
or hw hard i try.it wasnt enough for her to juz slow down
n walk with me.to ask her to make tt sacrifice is too much.
itz quite ironic smtimes.
itz was till tt day i was suddenly uncontactable tt she was
feeling worried for me.realising mayb..juz mayb i meant smthing.
watever she wanna do,i juz let her do it.
i wont be troubled anymore.itz her choice,her freedom.
but for nw.im really getting too tired.
i juz wanna hide bk into my shell n walk my own pace agn.
i dont wan anymore troubles to weigh me down.

theres a long war ahead of me nw.
i fighting it.by myself.

累，真的累了。

老了..

i cant believe juz in another few more days,
i wld be turning 26 alr.
another yr older..
well..anw.it makes no diff.
i still look quite young..hahaha
birthday,itz juz another day for me.
nv celebrated it before.
so im thankful tt ppl actually wanted to
help me celebrate.

im grateful to her tt she actally wanted to plan smthing for me.
well,thou it was quite bad planning skills,
i cant blame her coz she busy wif sch n training
i alr quite happy tt she has e thought.
i really dont nd elaborated celebration,
fancy gifts or anything.

all i really ask for is really simple,
a simple meal tgt,a movie would b juz fine.
juz sm quality time spent,
juz e two of us.
but tt was before,i had wished.
knowing her,she wld rather have a crowd.
coz itz much better tt way as she like it.
im ok with it.
i understand her more than she understand me.
im a simple person.
juz a simple affair will do juz fine.

i dont know how it will be like,
still kind of funny thou,
tt ppl r actually celebrating for me.
lol..wat e hell am i thinking??
but im juz take it as like a gathering ba.
hope i can enjoy myself n juz put me off
my recent troubles for awhile.

i cant wait for F1..getting real excited for this event.=)

对不起

listening to: 伯乐 - 林宥嘉

爱你的那一个 伤你的那一个
谁才是你爱情中的伯乐 放弃了这一个
然后等待着下一个 最后哪一个让你最舍不得
感谢不能让别人来说 你给过我的
她们是做不到的 那时候的幸福是真的
虽然过去了 我们也都经历了
释怀教育着仇恨 和平劝着天下人
故事发生便住下了 不管好的坏的
你让我成长了 就算是痛得值得
爱你的那一个 伤你的那一个
谁才是你爱情中的伯乐
放弃了这一个 然后等待着下一个
一个个过客过得快不快乐
爱你的那一个 伤你的那一个
谁才是你爱情中的伯乐 放弃了这一个
然后等待着下一个
别太多过客祝
你早日快乐
离开时别忘了 看看眼前的人
流泪记住了 还是微笑祝福着

Annoyed at myself.
poor with words.
when it comes to matters of e heart.
im sorry.
i have hurt another.
so sorry tt i really cant accept u.
it isnt tt u aint good enough.
juz tt i alr have her in my heart.
im thankful for ur affection.
but i juz cant leave her out of my heart nw.
if my words are harsh..
im really sorry.
i cherish our friendship
i really do,
so i hope it will stay tt way.
so i really wanna say:

对不起!

现在

There was a time I packed my dreams away
Living in a shell, hiding from myself.
There was a time when I was so afraid
I thought I’d reached the end.
Baby, that was then.
But I am made of more than my yesterdays.

I had to decide.
Was I gonna play it safe?
Or look somewhere deep inside,
Try to turn the tide.
Find the strength to take that step of faith?

I have a courage like never before,
I settled for less,
but I’m ready for more

This is my now,
And I am breathing in the moment.
As I look around,
I can’t believe the love I see.
My fear’s behind me,
Gone are the shadows and doubt.
That was then.
This is my now.

相信

不管苦与悲
相信会有人分忧
不管喜与乐
相信会有人分享
不管这条路多难走
相信会有人牵着我的手

只要有你陪在我左右，
我就会相信

只要相信，
相信自己。

我就会爱你。

简简单单

我们都是泡沫轻轻一碰就破

眼泪是爱的火花

昨天就像飞机穿过我的窗口

我什么都没有

我摊开了双手

你予取予求

直到你想自由

痛苦的时候我不会闪躲

就像树叶甘心为春风吹落

只是简简单单的爱过

我还是我

简简单单的想过

就不算白活

简简单单的疯过

被梦带走

当故事结束之后

心也喜欢一个人寂寞

歇息

tts e end of
partition @ mct A...rest in peace.

this is wat happens when things are gonna fall apart n u shldnt force it...

another day at wrk.

came late in e morn as usual..

eddie blasted my phone like crazy.

well,at least scott was relieved to see me when i reported at mct..LATE.

at least it was late than nv come at all..tts wat he said.

so he juz gave me e motivation to continue to be late..haha.

anw.it was city-mission lunch,

e ppl eat like crazy.i tot e 7th mth had alr passed??darn..

i had fun ranting at ah lian..

4 her mistake in making e guys at bel do a double job

frm changing their red n black tbl cloth to brown instead,

reason:coz she didnt read e change sheet..

tts a good way nt to let e manager close u early thou..lol

weijie,shawn n daniel came over frm bel to help with turnover,

after they retified ah-lian's mistake at bel.

e duo of weijie n shawn keep kbing each other thruout e setup,

itz always funny to see them wrk smtimes.

pratically it was quite fast as eddie sent another 3 staff frm brm.

it was then e hseman had prob with e patition at court A.

n we stood n see hw it slowly falls apart.

untill finally it was gone.RIP.

closed at 5pm n

went out with juliana bte selamat n agnes to hav dinner coz

our dear juli wanna buy 4D..??erm..ok.

she always warm me with her bubbliness.

wrk mct wedding dinner with scott n hakim.

scott was still tinkering with e idea of stealing aik boon frm bel,

but afraid tt eddie would steal me frm him to brm

let him drop e idea in e end.

so it was me n sandra at mct,

shawn,weijie,aikboon,daniel n qianna at bel,

agnes,juli n shandan at brm.

there wasnt much of a "government" when dinner started

as scott was busy looking after e tcc new staffs.

hakim was as his usual dissappearing acts

other than e ocassionallyof appearring in kitchen looking for food.

n plenty of it as 2 reserved tbl were nt opened.

so i grabbed food as well for my vip girls junjun n sandra.

qianna tried to sneak attack me on 2 occasion as she

was in e kitchen taking stuff while i was picking up.

she failed twice as i spotted her on both times.

all functions ended at 11.30pm as no turnover was required.

been a long time tt i had to take public transport hm.

well at least my supper was saved..

thks to lil sis n juli for dabaoing chicken rice frm brm..keke. :D
at e end of e day,it was fun as i totally juz focus on wrking.

random:

life is full of ups n downs.

smtimes i do wish theres was another person to take over frm me.

it doesnt really matter.but it was till then i realised,

there wont b another me.me will always be me,theres only 1.

i believe theres always a mountain higher,sm1 more capable than me.

i met my match in david ho n thomas chew.but with utter respect.

coz i nv see them as foes,rather as ppl i learn frm.

for e past few mths,thomas n i had alr build quite a reputation n a team.

coz we were really sharing alot of shit wrk.

e kbing n pking had help shit times past faster.thou nw he has left,

i wished him best of luck.

n itz back to myself on my own.

it was till sm of e nites i nv wrk they felt e pinch..

well i alr warn them beforehand.n i wld gladly pass it on to sm1 else e shit loads.so tt eddie can blast sm1 else phone n nt mine everytime.

of course there are still ppl i dont like when i wrk.

i looked him in e eye tt day,he didnt dare look straight at me.

guilty?mayb..he juz didint dare to look.

it doesnt matter anymore.i cant be bothered by these ppl.

i alr learnt things shld nt be forced.itz no use when it wasnt meant to be.

will juz stick to my promises.

for nw,i juz wan time to calm my heart,search my soul.

"累了就要坐下来歇息;
休息是为了走更长远的路."

是该停下脚步了，
去用心看一看。

juz let it be.

有时候

有时候 我会相信一切有尽头
相聚离开 都有时候 没有什么会永垂不朽
可是我害怕会被你知道 熬成缠绵的伤口
到底是要远远看你?
还是靠近一点更好?
我不确定你是不是我一直要找的主角
我用骗人的祈祷骗自己
我现在很好
和你在一起的每分每秒 就像走过彩虹隧道.

无私的爱

有人说这个世界不会有永恒的爱情。你我之间，如果 短暂的爱情也无法存在，不如放开彼此。爱你，就该让你去追寻你的幸福。
当你快乐时，我也 快乐。因为你的一切，我都在意

因为爱你，所以希望你快乐。
因为爱过你, 我依然不会后悔。

静静的

逃避不一定躲得过,

面对不一定最难受.

孤单不一定不快乐,

得到不一定能长久.

失去不一定不再有,

转身不一定最软弱.

这些话我了解，但是否做不做得到
我不知道, 我真的不知道

"世界上多了什么　好像变得很不同

站在妳身边　这一切都好宽阔

心里面藏着什么　你只想要让我懂

原来我的梦　也就是你的梦

纸条上写了什么　我好想要听你说

让字字句句　充满我们的笑容

永远要记得那天彼此许下的承诺

瞬间点亮的火花　是我们的拥有

我还在等着妳　静静的爱我

只要有你陪我　静静的就足够

你也在等着我　静静的温柔

就这样手牵手　静静的看着天空

静静的手牵手　是最简单的梦"

这就是最简单的梦
我放弃了吗?

重新出发

Random:


was basically charging myself e last few days.
really rotting in days without work.
sleeping away n stay out of hm
once i woke up
as usual my mum ranted.
ah...
finally will be wrking tdy.



well,was suppose to accompany cheryl to repair her phone,
in e end her phone revived by itself,
so we save e trip n money to sent for repair.
n we didnt meet up in e end.


got a surprise call frm christine
havent met her in mths since her dad pass away late last yr.
wanted to mit up for dinner.
quite a surprised to me when she told me she own me a dinner treat.lol
anw,met her in suntec as i was in town.
she look in better spirits nw compare to e last time i saw her.
much more cheerful nw.


i didnt wanted her to burnt her wallet so i actually suggested foodcourt.
in e end gt reprimanded by her,saying tt im too unpolite n nt giving her face.
coz she was supposed to give me a treat.so shes nt ggin to settle for foodcourt.
this is e 1st time i gt a treat frm a girl,so awkard..=P
so in e end i let her decide instead.
we ended walking round e fountain of wealth n stopped
we stare at each other n in a moment of silence
still cant decide wat to eat..kind of dumb..haha.


chris: u r still e same old u.. she said
me: wat?!..i really cant decide these kind of things.i stuff watever is edible in my stomach..i replied.


well.finally we decide to go western.
n we chose NYDC.we sat in
then came another prob..e menu
i hate to read frm a menu with a long list of food.
so i threw e ball back to chris n let her chose instead as she e one paying
juz nt nice for me to chose.
n she made e recommendations n i ask her to go ahead with it.

we had a breeze conversation thru meal.
we were quite bad as we gossips of our common friends n our past time.
it was quite smtime tt i had chatted with smone tt was so close to me in e past
haven been able to really let my hair down e past few weeks as prob held me down n made me so uptight.so e chat really help me losen up abit.
back to my nonsensical self as we joked.
i haven seen her smile for quit awhile since her dad pass away.
so nw i knew she really had letten go abit n was much more braver in facing e truth.
im happy for her tt she was able to let go.
after which she ordered a latte n a american cheesecake for me.
came as a surprised she still remb tt i drink a double shot latte n my fav cheesecake.
tot she had alr forgotten.haha.
i share e dessert with her as i was really quite full le.
guess i nd to hav sm exercise after this meal..lol


we ended dinner n i felt quite bad tt a girl actually paid for my meal. =(
so i offered tt i act as a bodyguard for her n escort her home safely in return.
she laughed agn at my nonsense.
so we stroll our way to esplanade as she said she nd to burn sm calories.haha
we sat down n enjoy e breeze for awhile as we waited for our full stomachs to digest.
after which we took a bus to her place n i walk with her a farmiliar route tt we taken before.
e place havent change much juz tt e park nearby has been upgraded.
we reach her place n i thanked her for e dinner treat which i still don noe for watever reason as i didnt ask..
n she thank me vice versa for senting her back.
bidded goodbyes n goodnites as i started to make my way bk hm.


along e way,i was thinking.
it was almost like old times when we were tgt.
juz tt nw we are juz friends.
n i was glad we were still be able to be friends thou she was e one who initiated e breakup.
i noe tt in my heart theres ony 1 tt i loved till nw.
n when i reached home,she was still e person tt i sent a msg to.
of course theres e facts i accepted,tt thou i gave my heart to her.
e love wont be reprocitated.itz alrite.i alr quite contented nw.
wat more do i need to ask?


relationship is not my piroity nw
for me itz time to start my life once more.
start afresh.
new me,new plans ahead.
i need to move ahead n nt stopping at where i am.

重新出发!!

我是坏人

如果说你要走 我不会留

我不去管以后

多么痛 多么的难过

别越爱越难过

然后连话都不说 继续沉默

连朋友都没得作 为了什么

然后跟别人说你其实还是爱我

就算了吧

坏人我来做

坏人我来做...

忘了爱

thoughts:

been thinking long n hard.
looking back at e times we have been tgt.
it has been really wonderful.
i shld return ur freedom.
juz bcoz u shld be happy.

说
对我诉说你跟他满脸笑容
我微笑地聆听接受
过去的你和我是否也爱得那么冲动
痛哭好久 开心也有 让人感动
心情不好你会来跟我说
我安慰你不难过
等你恢复笑容总是笑着道谢转身走
I could see I love you
It hurts me deep in my heart
你还在我心上某一个地方
看着你为了他失魂落魄不说一句话
但是我的心现在却比你还伤
I could see I love you
It hurts me deep in my heart
我不能像你这样说分了就忘
我这样是坚强
还是忘了爱的勉强
让你看透我的心现在我不想
是该说放就放
就试着遗忘
痛苦我会遗忘
只想看你开心的模样
新的恋情让它成长
而过去
就放在心上

one day u will meet e person tt u would actually love
it doesnt have to be me.

Cause I Believe
那幸福不滅的定律
你的手心 不一定由我握緊
就像恆星總會有發光的原因
And I Believe
你值得被珍惜
也值得我放棄

手放开

lyrics: Here Without You - 3 Doors Down

Everything I know, and anywhere I go

It gets hard but it wont take away my love

And when the last one falls

When it's all said and done

It gets hard but it wont take away my love

I'm here without you baby

But you're still on my lonely mind

I think about you baby

And I dream about you all the time

I'm here without you baby

But you're still with me in my dreams

And tonight girl its only you and me

thoughts:


life is juz like a ferris wheel.
it goes round n round,in cycles tt will nv stop.
smtimes u juz wish it stop at e highest pt.
stopping at tt moment of time
where e most beautiful view is.

itz e same thing in relationship.
realise smthings doesnt last forever.
i given my all n shldnt have any regrets anymore
i have no regrets loving her.
n during this period of time,
im contented.
itz time to let go.
letting her free
letting her fly.
goodbye is e hardest word to say.
but its better than hearing a thousand sorries


promises are forever,they still lasts forever.